Tech Daily Dose

In Case You Missed It: 'Series Of Tubes' Returns

It had been a while since I thought about Senate Commerce Committee kingpin Ted Stevens' infamous commentary on the Internet, which he described as a "series of tubes." But thanks to CNBC Chief Washington Correspondent John Harwood, all those memories of the "net neutrality" debate in the 109th Congress came rushing back.

Harwood told Jon Stewart on "The Daily Show" on Wednesday that the satirical news program's hilarious treatment of the Stevens rant is mentioned in his new book, "Pennsylvania Avenue: Profiles in Backroom Power," as an example of how the media can be used to spin an issue memorably and humorously out of control.

In honor of that shout-out, I've posted my favorite YouTube remix of the Stevens speech above. Enjoy! I think the net neutrality debate in the 110th Congress is missing a gem like this.

Posted by Andrew at 11:36 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Craigslist Ad Of The Day

A friend and former journalist who left the Fourth Estate to work on Capitol Hill sent along a pretty funny e-mail Wednesday morning about one of my favorite Web sites for blog fodder: Craigslist.org. The classified ad is particularly amusing given Democratic presidential hopeful Sen. Barack Obama's big victory in North Carolina on Tuesday night and Sen. Hillary Clinton's modest win in Indiana.

Free Hillary Clinton Campaign Material (16th and Penn)
________________________________________
Reply to: sale-671432270@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-05-07, 11:07AM EDT

Bumper stickers, yard sign, pins, mugs, folders, letterhead and a large banner. Won't be needing them.

Location: 16th and Penn
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

Posted by Andrew at 11:40 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

NY Post Entertains With 'Fight Night' Game

Some creative (and computer-savvy) minds at the New York Post have unveiled a Web-based "2008 Democratic Fight Night" game that lets a reader toss his or her favorite candidate --- either Sen. Barack Obama, D-Ill., or Sen. Hillary Clinton, D-N.Y. -- into a virtual boxing ring to beat the living daylights out of the rival wannabe nominee.

A colleague who sent me the link pointed out that the game is "not quite Grand Theft Auto, but it still entertains." Well, he's right. It's a hoot. You can check it out here. Now, who will come up with the online game where presumptive Republican nominee Sen. John McCain of Arizona pummels himself? Any takers?

Posted by Andrew at 11:07 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Bloggers Ask What's Reflected In Cheney's Glasses?

(Photo Credit: David Bohrer/White House)

The Internets are abuzz over the reflection in Vice President Dick Cheney's sunglasses. Yes kids, it must be Friday. Some have already shut off their brains for the weekend. The official White House photograph is of Cheney fly-fishing on the Snake River in Idaho and the image in his lenses is probably something outdoorsy. But a quick blog search shows that folks are taking their own wild guesses.

Posted by Andrew at 11:18 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Friday Funnies: You Know You're a Political Staffer...

The Potomac Flacks blog points out the Facebook group "You Know You're A Political Staffer When…" The social network site's sub-community has a list of fun (and accurate) ways to know if you are, in fact, a political staffer.

A few examples:
• No one looks at you funny when you sleep at the office
• Your friends visit your office to make sure you’re still alive
• Therapy is something you wish you could get for free after the election
• Your track record, has nothing to do with sports
• Your best friend’s name is Blackberry
• Time is measured in cycles instead of years.
• Your desk kind of reminds you of the movie Twister, after the tornado hit

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'Congress Has Given Up On The Actual World'

Comedy Central's "The Daily Show" put its unique (and hilarious) spin on the recent House Energy and Commerce Telecommunications and the Internet Subcommittee hearing on virtual worlds like Second Life. Jon Stewart's take: "It's official: Congress has given up on the actual world."

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One Last April Fool's Day Joke

One last April Fool's Day joke -- even though it's now April 2.

ZDNet reported that the main domain servers and related infrastructure controlling the Internet would be powered down for one hour on Tuesday, according to the Internet Corporation for Assigned Names and Numbers. The body responsible for maintaining the registry of domain names and IP addresses announced that it would effectively turn off the Internet in order to gauge the ecological impact of such a move. The decision follows the success of the recently observed "Earth Hour," in which people around the globe turned off their lights for one hour in a gesture towards saving energy. Read the full story here.

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"Anti-Rust" April Fool's Day Joke

The American Antitrust Institute sent out a press release on Tuesday from the American Anti-Rust Institute -- the imaginary nonprofit research arm of the domestic anti-rust industry. The fake trade group reportedly threatened to sue the American Bar Association antitrust section and others "who include in their name the word antitrust, claiming trademark, copyright, and various other intellectual property violations."

Washington attorney Timothy J. Muris, speaking at a gathering of the ABA antirust section, declared that confusion between rust and trust is easy to explain, in that the recent evaporation of the nation's secretarial pool has left communications dependent on people who cannot type accurately.

The press release ended with this blurb: "We offer this editor's note at our liability insurer's request in recognition that the media not only occasionally drops a 't' or adds a hyphen but from time to time fails to deduce that an AAI April 1 offering may not be altogether straightforward."

Posted by Andrew at 05:56 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Real 'Father Of The Internet' Revealed

Here's an April Fool's Day hoax courtesy of the funnymen (and women) at 463 Communications. Enjoy…

WASHINGTON -- After years of controversy and uncertainty, DNA testing has finally proven the real father of the Internet. It’s a gas station attendant in Norman, Oklahoma. Given the obvious promiscuity of the Internet’s mother, the real father has long been in doubt.

Robert Kahn, Tim Berners-Lee and Vint Cerf were all known to have dated the woman, Mildred Pollymokker, in the mid 1960s and 1970s. Others, including JCR Licklider, Paul Baran and Robert Taylor were all known to have “spent time” with Ms. Pollymokker around that time. “Let’s face it, the mother of the Internet got around,” said Cerf. Read the full release here.

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More April Fool's Day Hilarity: Public Knowledge

The intellectual property pranksters over at Public Knowledge got us good this time. The group's president, Gigi Sohn, put out a statement commenting on supposed new IP enforcement legislation that is "a tragedy wrapped in a travesty" and "a travesty wrapped in a tragedy." At first blush, I thought it was authentic because she's never been shy about creatively informing the press about her feelings on a particular measure.

Under the fabricated bill, new government agencies, including a Department of Intellectual Property Security, would be created and given extraordinary powers. Copyright protection would be extended to new types of works and with even longer terms of protection in force. “This bill should be read very carefully. Anyone would have to be a fool to vote for this bill," Sohn said. To read the full text of the spoof legislation, click here (see commentary from PK in the margins).

Posted by Andrew at 01:56 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Google's April Fool's Day Prank(s)

April Fool's Day is upon us and Google's annual "gotcha" is a so-called Custom Time feature for Gmail that supposedly lets users send e-mails that are time-stamped with the date of the sender's choosing. The e-mails can be marked read or unread in the recipient's inbox. The tagline: "Be on time. Every time." Read more about the fake application here.

Some of the user testimonials, like this one, are a hoot:
"I used to be an honest person; but now I don't have to be. It's just so much easier this way. I've gained a lot of productivity by not having to think about doing the 'right' thing." -- Todd J., Investment Banker

Update: Oh, and there's more. Another April Fool's Day gift from Google -- introducing Virgle. Here's a snippet from the press release:

MOUNTAIN VIEW, Calif. -- Google and Virgin Group today announced the launch of Virgle Inc., a jointly owned and operated venture dedicated to the establishment of a human settlement on Mars.

"Some people are calling Virgle an 'interplanetary Noah's Ark,'" said Virgin Group President and Founder Sir Richard Branson, who conceived the new venture. "I'm one of them. It's a potentially remarkable business, but more than that, it's a glorious adventure." Read the full release here.

Posted by Andrew at 08:19 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Charlie's Choice: His Face Or His MacBook

Mediabistro's TVNewser and Engadget report that PBS interviewer Charlie Rose suffered a black eye and wore a bandage on his brow on his Monday night show after tripping on a 59th Street pothole in Manhattan.

He had to choose between protecting his newly purchased MacBook Air or his face -- he chose the former. According to his producers, "The Macbook Air is fine, he showed us the blood stains on it this morning." [That's Engadget's doctored photo above.]

Speaking of MacBook Air, I'm addicted to "New Soul," the whimsical ditty by Yael Naim featured on the computer's TV ad. First Feist and now this? Apple is quite the new music trend-spotter.

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A New Spin On The Spitzer Scandal

The high-priced call girl who effectively ended New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer's political career this week happens to be an aspiring musician and a song featured on her MySpace.com page is getting quite a bit of radio airplay.

Several stations, including the Big Apple's "K-Rock" and Z-100, downloaded Ashley Alexandria Dupre's song "What We Want" and featured it as part of their pop music line up. Eric Johnson of New Jersey's WSJO told Radio-Info.com that "it's not a bad mid-tempo pop song. We’ll spike it in and let the listeners decide."

News of Dupre's ditty is particularly interesting given Spitzer's high-profile crusade against radio "payola." When he was the state's attorney general, his office served subpoenas against record labels in a probe into the illegal compensation of radio stations for playing certain songs.

A tipster tells Tech Daily Dose that Spitzer "can now claim that his anti-payola efforts at getting new artists on the air were successful." "Apparently Spitzer thinks pay-for-play wasn't so bad after all," the snarky source added.

Posted by Andrew at 12:49 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Judiciary Chairman Conyers: OK Go-Go Dancer?

One quick addition to my earlier post about this afternoon's network neutrality hearing: There was a humorous exchange between House Judiciary Committee Chairman John Conyers, D-Mich., and Damian Kulash, the lead vocalist for OK Go. Kulash explained the overwhelming response to a contest his band held for fans to recreate an expertly choreographed dance video they released on YouTube.

Conyers: A number of people up here think that we can do that too. Would you be willing to accept a Judiciary Committee video?
Kulash: It would have to be submitted by the same means as everyone else. [Audience laughter]

That's when I conjured up a mental picture of Conyers and fellow antitrust task force members (maybe Steve Chabot, Sheila Jackson-Lee and Ric Keller) doing the dance to "A Million Ways." Watch the video here.

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Friday Funnies: The Colbert Report

"Get on the phone and say you support the Protect America Act - the right people will be listening."

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PTO Director: Gym Bunny, Multitasker

I'm so happy to hear that I'm not the only intellectual policy watcher who enjoys hitting the gym regularly. I'm prone to reading congressional testimony on the elliptical machine or catching up with e-mails while I'm stair-stepping but when Patent and Trademark Office Director Jon Dudas gets a workout -- he's a true multitasker.

At a House Judiciary Courts, the Internet and Intellectual Property Subcommittee hearing on PTO oversight, Dudas told members that he likes to chat with employees at his agency's fitness center about ways to improve examiner productivity and contentment. The PTO has been criticized for its backlog of patent applications and employee retention problems.

After ticking off a number of complaints about working conditions at the agency, veteran examiner Robert Budens got a good-natured ribbing from Michigan Democrat John Conyers, who chairs the full committee. "Would going to the gym more with Mr. Dudas help you?" Conyers asked. "One look at me says it may help me in some ways… but I’m not sure it would help improve our relationship," responded Budens, who is heavyset.

Read more about the PTO hearing in CongressDaily's AM on Thursday.

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Happy Valentines Day, I Love/Hate You

In the fourth season of MTV's popular show, "The Real World," one character (a lead singer in a punk-rock band) receives a pig's heart pierced with nails on Valentine's Day. If they could get away with it, the National Association of Broadcasters and the music industry might swamp similarly morose gifts -- but instead, they opted for a lighter approach.

The NAB, which opposes a congressional effort to end a longstanding performance royalty exemption for AM and FM radio stations, will run ads in several papers on Thursday highlighting the "love affair" between record labels and America's radio broadcasters. Click here to see the ad.

The musicFirst coalition, backed by the Recording Industry Association of America, royalty collector SoundExchange and others, issued a response to the ads that asks: "Why does NAB refuse to pick up the tab on Valentine’s Day… or any other day for that matter?"

"It is ironic on Valentine’s Day - of all days - that NAB would highlight how they don’t pick up the check on dates. It really is a sad story of unrequited love," alliance spokesman Tod Donhauser said. "Artists love radio, but radio doesn’t love artists enough to compensate them for their intellectual property."

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Friday Funnies: Helping Brit Get Home

This has nothing to do with tech policy, but it's Friday so it's fair game. The Huffington Post's snarky sibling 236.com published hilarious, fake turn-by-turn Mapquest directions for troubled pop tart Britney Spears' trip home from the UCLA psychiatric ward earlier this week.

Here's a sample:

Start out going west on Medical Center Circle; Continue circling until all the paparazzi are tipped off; turn right into oncoming traffic 'cause that’s how British people drive, y'all; stay straight while you look for a *#$%! lighter; take a violent right into the next Jack-In-The-Box drive-thru.

Read the rest of the directions here.

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Striking Writers Get Laughs On Capitol Hill

Representatives from the Writers Guild of America who have been on strike since early November brought their message to Capitol Hill on Wednesday with a skit that delivered more humor than most of the TV networks' primetime comedies. See Technology Daily's PM Edition.

As you can tell from the photo, a large crowd of lawmakers, congressional aides, and members of the press turned up to watch a trio of writers face off against several Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers imposters. The scribes who took part in the performance work for Comedy Central's "The Colbert Report" and "The Daily Show."

Former White House press secretary Dee Dee Myers, who was a consultant to NBC's "The West Wing," moderated the debate. She began by asking both sides: "Are you or have you ever been a member of the Communist party?" Her remark poked fun at the infamous McCarthy hearings of the 1940s when movie industry titans were called to testify about their suspected ties to Communism.

At one point during the skit, one of the "witnesses" was asked how much money the entertainment industry made from Internet distribution last year. His answer was "I don’t recall." That was a hat-tip to former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales who gave senators a similar answer (repeatedly) when grilled about the controversial firing of U.S. attorneys last year.

One of the AMPTP pretenders warned against the ultimate power of Hollywood unions likening their influence to that of one of China's most legendary and contentious figures. "Before you know it, we'll be watching 'According To Mao' and 'Foot Binding With The Stars,'" he quipped.

Continue reading "Striking Writers Get Laughs On Capitol Hill" »

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'Esteban Colbert' Interviews Lou Dobbs

I couldn’t help following up on last week's post about Consumer Electronics Association President Gary Shapiro's live, televised fight with CNN anchor Lou Dobbs. The CEA chief took Dobbs to task for his "anti-trade" agenda and the sparks flew.

A colleague sent me this video of funnyman Stephen Colbert's interview with the controversial pundit. In the skit, the Comedy Central fixture poses as "Esteban Colbert" and questions Dobbs en espanol. While much of the one-on-one focuses on immigration, there was this interesting exchange:

Colbert: Listen, Benjamin Franklin was a businessman.
Dobbs: He certainly was and an imminently successful one.
Colbert: Corporations have rights too. You don’t want to deny corporations their own American dream of outsourcing jobs.
Dobbs: I wouldn’t want to… I would prefer that they find a conscience and deny themselves that expediency.

Posted by Andrew at 03:29 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Former DHS Chief Routinely Detained By TSA

Former Homeland Security Department Secretary Tom Ridge told a roomful of lawyers on Friday that despite his prior post within the Bush administration, he has been pulled aside for secondary screening at airport security checkpoints two dozen times.

"You ought to see the expression on the [faces of the] people at TSA when they put me in that plexiglass lane," he said during a morning keynote at an American Bar Association conference. "Some think I'm a plant and that I'm testing their procedures out." Ridge said fellow passengers have stopped to gawk (and laugh) when they see him being detained.

After a 25-year government career, adjusting to life as a public citizen has been difficult, he joked. The morning after Ridge left his DHS job, he recalls waking up to find that his kids took one car, his wife took the other and he had no way to get around. When he asked to borrow his son's vehicle, Ridge was advised: "Watch where you park it and don’t forget to fill it up with gas when you bring it home."

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Ugh, Poetry: T'was The Night Before Recess

The good folks at Edelman who do the flacking for the musicFirst coalition must have spiked their office party eggnog. The group, which wants AM and FM radio stations to pay royalties to artists, has released a "T'was The Night Before Recess" holiday poem and it just begged to be blogged.

The coalition, which is backed by the Recording Industry Association of America and others, sent the poem to Capitol Hill on Wednesday. They are obviously still celebrating Tuesday's introduction of legislation in both chambers, which could be summed up as their biggest Christmas wish. Read more in Technology Daily's PM Edition.

The lengthy poem, penned to the cadence of "T'was the Night Before Christmas," can be read after the jump. No word yet on whether the National Association of Broadcasters will create rebuttal prose. NAB spokesman Dennis Wharton is pretty good at whipping up snarky comebacks so I'm sure he's hard at work.

Continue reading "Ugh, Poetry: T'was The Night Before Recess" »

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Wackiest Workplace Stories Have Tech Angle

Workplace consulting firm Challenger, Gray & Christmas unveiled its annual compilation of the year's strangest business-related stories on Wednesday and it should come as no surprise that technology played an important role in the wackiness.

▪ An announcer for London's Tube system was fired in November after recording spoof messages and posting them on her Web site. Some of the alerts told American tourists they were talking too loudly and warned male passengers to stop staring at female riders.

▪ Hip-hop mogul P. Diddy turned to the Internet this summer to find a personal assistant. Applicants had three minutes to showcase their talents and win him over. More than 10,000 Diddy-helper hopefuls applied for the position via video-sharing site YouTube.

▪ An Iowa woman was fired in January for misuse of company time – keeping an electronic diary about how she avoids work. Some of the entries detailed her efforts to fool management into believing she was hard at work, usually by furiously typing. The entire 300-page, single-spaced tome was written on the clock with a company computer.

Non-tech stories involved a South Korean bank that sent its employees on blind dates; a hotel chain's job posting for a Chief Beer Officer position; an architecture firm's moon-based design project; and a Thai law enforcement program involving "Hello Kitty" armbands.

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Your Holiday Cookie, Delivered

It's Friday afternoon and the Technology Daily staff was in desperate need of a sugar fix. Lo and behold, a bag of holiday cheer appears. AT&T branded cookies! Good work, guys. Follow the jump for another shot of my colleague Michael Martinez chowing down.

Continue reading "Your Holiday Cookie, Delivered" »

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BarneyCam VI: "Holiday In the National Parks"

(Photo Credit: Eric Draper/White House)

As promised, the White House unveiled its annual holiday video starring President Bush's Scottish Terriers Barney and Miss Beazley on Wednesday. In this year's installment, the dogs want to become junior park rangers with the National Park Service… but first, they have to help decorate the White House for Christmas.

The Web video features a cameo appearance by Interior Department Secretary Dirk Kempthorne (one of the lesser-known members of the administration) as well as some pretty bad acting by First Daughters Jenna and Barbara. Oh, and former Prime Minister Tony Blair also shows up. I guess he didn’t have much else going on.

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Big Media Foes Team With Harry Potter Fans

StopBigMedia.com, a coalition aimed at fighting media consolidation, has teamed up with the Harry Potter Alliance to mobilize thousands of fans of the fictional boy wizard. The two groups launched Potterwatch on Wednesday -- an effort that uses the character to illustrate the dangers of allowing big business to swallow up local media outlets.

In the book series, wizarding newspapers like the Daily Prophet put the magical community in jeopardy "by denying Voldemort's return … and ultimately becoming a mouthpiece for Voldemort," alliance creator Andrew Slack said in a press release.

[Disclaimer: I've never read a Potter book or seen a Potter movie so I have no idea what this guy is talking about but I'm sure those of you who are in the know either agree or disagree with his thesis.]

The Potterwatch movement brought together opponents of the sinister Voldemort, Slack said. StopBigMedia.com and the alliance "have come together to create a Potterwatch movement in the real world to fight back against 'Voldemedia' -- the handful of companies that control most of what we see, hear and read every day."

The groups are urging fans to speak out against FCC Chairman Kevin Martin's plan to loosen media ownership rules later this month. Ironically, some policy watchers have whispered that Martin looks a little like the spellbinding whippersnapper. Go figure.

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Kevin Martin & Eddie Fritts: Kings Of Comedy?

Highlights from Wednesday night’s annual FCC Chairman’s Dinner at the Washington Hilton, sponsored by the Federal Communications Bar Association. FCC Chief Kevin Martin, weary from a long day before Congress, poked fun at his recent battles with lawmakers and the cable industry:

“I have to admit that I usually dread delivering this speech. I’m not nearly as good at comedy as – oh, I don’t know – say charming my fellow FCC commissioners.”

“This year I can say I'm actually thrilled to be here. In fact, if I weren't at this dinner, I'd still be testifying before Congress.”

“Now I recognize that I’ve brought some of my recent problems on myself. For example, my cable choice proposal. You know the one, where cable gets to choose to do whatever I say.”

“But seriously, I’ve heard your complaints about how late the meetings have been starting. So I’d thought I’d start my next one early. So I’d like to welcome everyone to the December . . . [laughter]”

“Honestly, though, enough is enough with these late-night meetings. I just can’t keep delaying the meetings so you can run up your billable hours anymore. I think the clients are catching on.”

“I recognize that as rough as things are right now, they could be a lot worse. Some of you might remember a recent headline from the Washington Post” (The headline “Chinese Regulator is Sentenced to Death” was displayed on video screens throughout the ballroom)

“I should wrap it up here. I have another Senate hearing next week. Hopefully I’ve accomplished my real goal for the evening – doing enough bad jokes that they’ll criticize me for the jokes rather than my policies.”

Continue reading "Kevin Martin & Eddie Fritts: Kings Of Comedy?" »

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Father Of The Web Gets Fresh

When Vint Cerf, the man cited as one of the fathers of the modern-day Internet, sat down for a chat with the State Department's David Gross at the Family Online Safety Institute conference on Thursday, something seemed amiss.

Before answering questions formulated by Gross, the agency's communications and information policy coordinator, Google's chief Internet evangelist noted that his last name is spelled C-E-R-F, not C-E-R-T, as the gigantic projection screens on either side of the stage avowed.

The good humored Cerf made a crack about whether his mouth needed freshening (Certs is a popular breath mint manufactured by Cadbury-Adams). After a bit of audience laughter, the session commenced. Organizers promised that they spelled his name correctly in the program.

Read more coverage from the FOSI summit in Technology Daily's PM Edition.

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Crazy In Love … With My Handheld Device

As readers of this blog and of Technology Daily, you're keenly aware that our business is reporting the ins and outs and ups and downs of the high-tech policy world. Unsurprisingly, part of that job is keeping tabs on the latest techno-toys that hit the market and make life easier (or in some instances harder) for consumers.

So, here's my admission. Brace yourself. Before this week, I had never owned a "smart phone." Sure, my Motorola Razr was kind of smart -- like a toddler who knows his ABCs and basic math before entering preschool -- but not as smart as the iPhones, BlackBerrys and such that everyone but me seemed to be toting around.

Over the Thanksgiving holiday, I took the leap. I bought a Palm. It's new, it's hip, it's slim and it's relatively affordable compared to the rest of the options offered by my wireless provider, which will remain nameless due to our protracted, tumultuous relationship (that I hope is on the mend).

E-mail, Web surfing, scheduling -- all at my fingertips. In the elevator; on the sidewalk; in a meeting; during a cross-town commute; on the elliptical machine at the gym. I have realized in the past couple of days what many have known for some time -- the euphoria of being "connected" wherever and whenever you want.

I consider myself an insanely productive person and this can only add to my efficiency. That said, the obligation of always being reachable might interfere with the non-work components of my life. I guess that's why the device has this novel "off" button. Plus, the tiny cramped keyboard might be murder on my fingers.

But, we'll see how it plays out … and if you e-mail me, you might just get a brief, sloppily typed response as I'm climbing the 200th floor on the stair-stepper at Washington Sports Club.

Posted by Andrew at 09:22 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Yes, Intellectual Property Policy Can Be Funny

The Federal Communications Bar Association hosted a briefing on Monday about copyright issues at the FCC and the FTC. Panelists covered a number of interesting intellectual property matters brought before the federal agencies -- but concluding remarks at the event turned into a self-promotion-palooza (with a pinch of humor).

Consumer Electronics Association lobbyist Michael Petricone made a push for his organization's annual trade show in Las Vegas in early January where he said high-tech copyright issues will be discussed in detail.

Then, Public Knowledge President Gigi Sohn piped up, urging attendees to take a look at her group's six-point plan for copyright reform. The proposal would fix current laws that the group believes are "out of touch with our technological reality."

Fritz Attaway, who is executive vice president of the Motion Picture Association of America, said he did not have anything to endorse. He paused briefly then exclaimed: "Go see a movie -- and pay for it." One small step to combat film piracy, one giant leap for mankind.

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Mike Huckabee: 'Chuck Norris Approved'

Republican presidential hopeful Mike Huckabee has turned to obscure humor to win support. The former Arkansas governor, whose popularity is waning in recent polls, posted a political ad on his campaign Web site and on YouTube this week announcing that he is backed by martial artist and actor Chuck Norris.

A running gag involving satirical "facts" about Norris has become an Internet phenomenon and has even engaged the "Walker, Texas Ranger" star himself. The facts typically involve claims of Norris's masculinity and "alpha-male" status.

In the Huckabee video, the candidate appears on screen with Norris and says the TV tough guy is the focus of his plan to secure the U.S. border from illegal immigrants, which is a regular topic of debate among presidential contenders.

Huckabee says: "There is no chin behind Chuck Norris's beard -- only another fist," and then adds: "When Chuck Norris does a push-up, he isn’t lifting himself up; he's pushing the Earth down." Norris, in turn, calls Huckabee "a principled, authentic conservative."

"Chuck Norris doesn’t endorse," Huckabee quips. "He tells America how it's gonna be." Watch the full video here.

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Someone, Please Give Me Your Ticket

The writers' strike against Hollywood producers over new media royalties has prompted a stunning, brilliant occurrence. Striking cast members and writers of NBC's "30 Rock" and "Saturday Night Live" will perform one-night-only live shows at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre in New York City in the coming days.

The entire cast of SNL has been confirmed for the 11:30 p.m. performance this Saturday, according to the New York Observer's Culture Czar blog. The cast of "30 Rock" will take to the stage on Monday at 8 p.m. The sold-out shows will benefit the Writers Guild strike fund.

Update: Gasp! Fans are trolling Craigslist for tickets to the shows...

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NAB Flack Makes Broadway Debut

If the National Association of Broadcasters' well-known mouthpiece Dennis Wharton ever tires of his day job, he could always pursue a career on Broadway. The former journalist and fixture on Capitol Hill got his first taste of the stage during a trip to the Big Apple last weekend.

Wharton, who serves as the powerful lobbying group's executive vice president of media relations, told Tech Daily Dose that he and his wife got cheap seats for the acclaimed "25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee," only to be chosen as an on-stage extra.

The affable flack sat in the risers with the ensemble cast of the musical comedy and played along when background characters were needed. Wharton even got a turn at the microphone and successfully spelled "Mexicans." He was eliminated after being presented with a longer, weirder word that he could not recall.

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Friday Funnies: Peek Inside The IT Room

I don’t know what "The IT Room" is but it might just become the source of some seriously amusing viral videos. A number of features on the Web site still read "coming soon" and a Whois look-up doesn’t provide much intel.

But the site does offer several teasers that give viewers a peek inside the hilarity unfolding inside a generic office space in Anywhere, USA. My favorite clip is when a staffer takes out some aggression on his PC. The site's characters include a blonde, a geek, two other guys, and a capuchin monkey. Completely random.

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Tech Daily's Best Lede Of The Week

Technology Daily's best article lede of the week award goes to my colleague David Hatch for his coverage of Wednesday's FCC meeting. Here's how he started off his story:

Media consolidation opponents turned out in force at a high-profile Halloween Day FCC meeting featuring a protest outside the agency, activists in cheerleader uniforms, and a self-described "corporate media whore" in a French maid outfit who briefly upstaged the agency's chairman while being momentarily detained in the hearing room.

Read the entire article here.

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Tough IP Talk From Berman & Bono

Rep. Mary Bono, who co-chairs the Congressional Caucus on Intellectual Property Promotion and Piracy Prevention, has zero-tolerance rule for counterfeit goods -- just ask her staff. The California Republican recently fired one of her aides when she learned that the staffer bought a fake designer purse while visiting China on a work trip.

Bono told the story at a Tuesday briefing on Capitol Hill, where she appeared alongside U.S. Trade Representative Susan Schwab and a handful of other IP caucus members (Read more about the event in Technology Daily's PM Edition).

Fellow Californian Howard Berman, who chairs the House Judiciary Courts, the Internet and Intellectual Property Subcommittee, joked that a forthcoming IP enforcement bill will set an even higher penalty for purchasing a bootlegged Louis Vuitton.

Bono's staffer would not have just lost her job, "she'd be executed," cracked the Democrat who represents Los Angeles and the San Fernando Valley. Berman's staffers better hide their pirated music collections, ASAP.

Update: A spokesman for Bono clarified that the aide in question was not fired for her purchase -- she left "in good graces" to pursue another job. The congresswoman's remark was "just a good punch-line" at the IP event.

The office does, however, have a strict policy when it comes to IP protection. If an employee is found using business resources in an inappropriate way, "that person would be reprimanded," he said. "When it comes to individuals' actions outside of the office, we don’t try to police them. We do not want to play big brother."

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Friday Funnies: Judge Rader Tells Jokes

If Judge Randall Rader of the Federal Circuit Court of Appeals ever gets tired of hearing patent cases, he could fall back on a stand-up comedy career. Rader kicked off a luncheon keynote on Friday by telling a few jokes.

Humor that is paraphrased on a blog post is not nearly as gut-busting as hearing Rader's tales at the American Intellectual Property Law Association summit, but I'll give it a shot.

He said he recently tried a case in Oakland, Calif. and the jury was selected after a "painful process" of listening to excuses from potential jurors as to why they could not participate. An attorney in the case told Rader: "It's hard to be a trial attorney. My client's life and my future depend on 12 people who are not smart enough to avoid jury service."

The judge responded: "I thought you were going to say your future depended on a trial judge who'd never tried a criminal case before." Quickly, the lawyer fired back: "Your honor, if I'd known that, I would have selected a better jury."

Continue reading "Friday Funnies: Judge Rader Tells Jokes" »

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Sirius/XM 'Merger Mania' Puzzle

What's a 12-letter word for a purported Sirius-XM "merger advantage for consumers" or the six-letter name of a former FCC chairman that supports the pending deal? How about an 11-letter description of what the National Association of Broadcasters allegedly fears?

Find out by playing "Merger Mania," a new crossword puzzle offered on the companies' merger Web sites -- www.SIRIUSmerger.com and www.XMmerger.com. Hats off to the satellite radio rivals for injecting some "fun" into the increasingly volatile debate.

No word yet on whether anyone at NAB, which opposes the $14 billion pairing, has tried their hand at the game. You can play along here.

Update: NAB Vice President Dennis Wharton told Tech Daily Dose that "it probably won't be long before XM and Sirius are claiming that crossword puzzles and hopscotch serve as competition to satellite radio."

"For the numerous consumer groups and more than 80 member of Congress who oppose this proposed monopoly, merging two fierce competitors with a history of breaking FCC rules is not a game," he added.

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Free Press Unveils 'Whack-A-Murdoch'

Media advocacy group Free Press unveiled a new, politically driven online distraction on Tuesday. It's a game called "Whack-A-Murdoch." The animated novelty came as News Corp., which is run by mogul Rupert Murdoch, launched its new Fox Business Network.

"As Murdoch’s latest venture is making headlines we hope to frame the issue around [media] consolidation and attract a new population of potential activists," Campaign Director Tim Karr said in an e-mail. "Hopefully, this will draw more attention and people to the issue as the FCC is weighing a decision that could further unleash the floodgates to consolidation."

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'30 Rock' Obsession Continues

YouTube star Chris Crocker, who made national headlines recently with his melodramatic defense of beleaguered pop singer Britney Spears, isn't the only fan recording online videos to protest the unfair treatment of celebrities.

Jack McBrayer, who play a lovable, bumbling NBC page named Kenneth on the network's comedy "30 Rock," posted this plea about CBS News anchor and former "Today Show" host Katie Couric, which is hilariously similar to the one Crocker posted about Spears.</